Friday, June 29, 2012

Hurry Up & Wait

We had court this last Tuesday to find out if Giavanna will be placed with us. The night before I tossed and turned restless and the whole day I felt like I was going to explode. Nervous energy ran through my chest and arms all day long and I'm sure my blood pressure was through the roof! Needless to say I was a little anxious to hear what the judge would rule and what the next few weeks would hold.
Court was... interesting. There was a lot of conversation that I didn't understand, something resembling english but sounding more like french. Gia's mom's trial for severance was set and her father's rights were removed as he has not been to any court dates. The judge ordered that we have a home study done and that was that.
A home study can take anywhere from 3 weeks to 2 months to complete. So from here it's waiting game. We do get to start visiting Gia next week and will gradually visit with her for longer and longer amounts of time so that she has a chance to get used to us and get to know us.
I feel like the weeks to come seem so surreal. I know that God is placing His plan for us at our feet and we need only to obey and follow. It's funny to think about how for the last two years all I've asked for was to become a mother. Funny how God's plans include exactly what we ask for but in His own way. I never imagined that our first child would come to us in this way but I am so grateful and excited to start our family.

Wednesday, June 20, 2012

A Whirlwind

Some crazy things have been happening in our world lately. I am honestly stunned at the possibilities that are ahead and all the doors that God seems to be opening. I don't even know where to start.... shortly after Jason and I decided that we would like to become foster parents we were approached by someone we know, and who has known Jason's family for a long time, with the possibility to become foster/adoptive parents for their niece's daughter. She is in foster care right now and will soon be up for adoption but the foster mom she is with is not interested in adoption so she needs a new placement. Her name is Giavanna and she is 16 months old.
At first we were very hesitant to enter into something like this. We had so many questions. What if we fall in love with her and want to adopt? What would that look like since we know her family members? Are we ready to be parents so soon? And to a 1 year old? So many questions with only one staring us in the face... {if we say no, are we closing the door on God? So we have to say yes and see what He says right?}
Well that's exactly what we did. We said yes to a God possibility and decided to see what He said about the situation. Our friend talked to the case worker the next day and to our surprise her response was a huge yes, let's see what a judge will say! So now we are waiting. Waiting to see what God says. We see a judge on the 26th and they will determine if Gia will be able to be placed with us.
In a few short weeks the possibility of us becoming parents to a beautiful 1 year old girl is very real! We are excited, scared, overwhelmed, trying not to get ahead of ourselves, yet planning so many things for the future. Please keep us in your prayers in the coming week. That God will give us the answers that fit His plans and not our own. That if Gia is meant to be our daughter He will prepare us for the crazy adventure ahead!

Tuesday, June 5, 2012

So it's been awhile.....

Ok, ok, I know... it's been like six months since I last posted. So either my life is incredibly busy and I just don't have the time or it's incredibly boring and I just don't have anything to write about. Hmm.. I'll let you figure out which excuse it is.
Let's see where do I start? The first half of this year has been... comfortable. Not much has changed really, we're settling in to our new home wonderfully and have even started on landscaping the backyard. The first thing to go in: an extended patio and fire pit! It has been so nice to sit by the fire at night with Jason and gaze up at the stars. It's become a comfort spot, we even fell asleep out there the other night.
It's nice to be comfortable. To not have a whole lot of worries. To enjoy life at work, at church, and at home. To learn to have an up side in life. To achieve goals. {Comfort}
In the midst of all this comfort I can't help but feel that something is missing... Something that I have a longing for in my heart...Something God has destined and ordained for us.... Something that He's promised to us...{A Child}
Many of you know that I have a condition called PCOS. This makes it very difficult to get pregnant, Jason and I have been trying for almost two years. It's been a rough journey, I've been heart broken and hopeful, desperate and afraid. We've come to the point in our journey where no matter the longing for a child we have made the decision that becoming pregnant and receiving the gift of a child is up to God. So medicines have been put aside. I'm working on becoming healthier physically and spiritually, and we are waiting patiently on our Father. I've come to be okay with this, comfortable even. {Comfortable in waiting.}
But this comfort in waiting still does not satisfy the longing I have for a child. So we are praying. We are seeking God's guidance and wisdom. We are considering foster care. It's something we always knew we would do... someday, after we had our own children. We always think God's plans for us are off in the distance, after our own. Well, I think God's re-arranging our plans. It's scary and exciting but ultimately I know God has a child (or children) picked out for us to care for. Updates are soon to come. We meet with an agency this week to start the first steps!!