A Whirlwind

Some crazy things have been happening in our world lately. I am honestly stunned at the possibilities that are ahead and all the doors that God seems to be opening. I don't even know where to start.... shortly after Jason and I decided that we would like to become foster parents we were approached by someone we know, and who has known Jason's family for a long time, with the possibility to become foster/adoptive parents for their niece's daughter. She is in foster care right now and will soon be up for adoption but the foster mom she is with is not interested in adoption so she needs a new placement. Her name is Giavanna and she is 16 months old.
At first we were very hesitant to enter into something like this. We had so many questions. What if we fall in love with her and want to adopt? What would that look like since we know her family members? Are we ready to be parents so soon? And to a 1 year old? So many questions with only one staring us in the face... {if we say no, are we closing the door on God? So we have to say yes and see what He says right?}
Well that's exactly what we did. We said yes to a God possibility and decided to see what He said about the situation. Our friend talked to the case worker the next day and to our surprise her response was a huge yes, let's see what a judge will say! So now we are waiting. Waiting to see what God says. We see a judge on the 26th and they will determine if Gia will be able to be placed with us.
In a few short weeks the possibility of us becoming parents to a beautiful 1 year old girl is very real! We are excited, scared, overwhelmed, trying not to get ahead of ourselves, yet planning so many things for the future. Please keep us in your prayers in the coming week. That God will give us the answers that fit His plans and not our own. That if Gia is meant to be our daughter He will prepare us for the crazy adventure ahead!

So it's been awhile.....

Ok, ok, I know... it's been like six months since I last posted. So either my life is incredibly busy and I just don't have the time or it's incredibly boring and I just don't have anything to write about. Hmm.. I'll let you figure out which excuse it is.
Let's see where do I start? The first half of this year has been... comfortable. Not much has changed really, we're settling in to our new home wonderfully and have even started on landscaping the backyard. The first thing to go in: an extended patio and fire pit! It has been so nice to sit by the fire at night with Jason and gaze up at the stars. It's become a comfort spot, we even fell asleep out there the other night.
{Comfortable}
It's nice to be comfortable. To not have a whole lot of worries. To enjoy life at work, at church, and at home. To learn to have an up side in life. To achieve goals. {Comfort}
In the midst of all this comfort I can't help but feel that something is missing... Something that I have a longing for in my heart...Something God has destined and ordained for us.... Something that He's promised to us...{A Child}
Many of you know that I have a condition called PCOS. This makes it very difficult to get pregnant, Jason and I have been trying for almost two years. It's been a rough journey, I've been heart broken and hopeful, desperate and afraid. We've come to the point in our journey where no matter the longing for a child we have made the decision that becoming pregnant and receiving the gift of a child is up to God. So medicines have been put aside. I'm working on becoming healthier physically and spiritually, and we are waiting patiently on our Father. I've come to be okay with this, comfortable even. {Comfortable in waiting.}
But this comfort in waiting still does not satisfy the longing I have for a child. So we are praying. We are seeking God's guidance and wisdom. We are considering foster care. It's something we always knew we would do... someday, after we had our own children. We always think God's plans for us are off in the distance, after our own. Well, I think God's re-arranging our plans. It's scary and exciting but ultimately I know God has a child (or children) picked out for us to care for. Updates are soon to come. We meet with an agency this week to start the first steps!!

HOME

About a month ago Jason and I had the privilege of moving in to our beautiful brand new home!!! It's our very first house and we were so blessed to be able to build brand new! We picked everything out and really made it our own! We love it and are so excited to fill it with memories!! Here's a few photos of the building process:

Being able to watch our house be built from the ground up was so amazing. We were able to bury a Bible in the foundation of our home before the cement was poured and we were able to write Bible verses on the studs of the walls before the drywall went in. It was such a blessing to be able to really dedicate our new home to God.

The Most Wonderful Time of the Year.... I Think

Christmas came and went so fast that I'm not even sure it really happened. Almost like a dream. I fell asleep and before I knew it I was awake again with this vague memory of what had been dancing through my brain just moments before.


This Christmas in particular was very different for me and a little difficult. We normally go to see my family in Colorado over the holidays. Being that I don't get to see them very often throughout the year and Jason's family emphasizes Thanksgiving more, we have always made it a priority to be there for Christmas. Well, with our new home-ownership and new-found adult-hood {that's a lot of hyphens in one sentence} we decided we wouldn't be able to afford to go home for Christmas. I was okay with it in theory until Christmas Eve came around and it hit me like a ton of bricks that I would be missing out on all of our family traditions and that I wouldn't be able to spend this time with some of the people I love most in life. I struggled to say the least through our Christmas eve service at church. I tried not to draw attention to the tears that streamed down my face.


Christmas morning came quickly and with the busyness of getting ready for service I didn't really notice the ache in my heart. We had so many plans for the day and I had so much to get done. Having Christmas dinner at our house meant a lot of preparation to keep me busy. I did get to spend some time talking with my family via video chat which meant so much to me. Being able to see my nephews and nieces all so excited to show off their presents and sing me a song or do a little dance. It was wonderful to feel that for just an hour I was with them and everything was as it should be.


I'm not complaining, I know it sounds really depressing to say the least. I missed my family very much, but looking back at the day I can see really how wonderful it was. Jason and I made some new traditions, we shared Christmas with his family {which we've never been able to do}, and we hosted everyone in our brand new home. It was exciting and fun and we made some really good memories:

Jason and I cooked a turkey! A turkey! And it was awesome and soo good! It was so fun to spend time with him in our brand new kitchen, asking each other what the heck we were doing and wondering what in the world that part of the turkey was? And if we were supposed to remove it or not?:) 

Wrapping presents just to open them a few hours later on the random Wednesday night before Christmas... just because we could:) 

Jason getting up early Christmas morning to make me sausage bread so that I felt more at home.

Singing carols at church and having no clue what the words were or how to play the song at all:)

Watching the kids do a Bible scavenger hunt.

Watching the best Christmas movie ever.... A Christmas Story! {You'll shoot your eye out!}

It was a really hard Christmas to be away from my family but looking at it now I am glad that we had the chance to make some memories in our own home, memories that will last forever and maybe some new traditions that will too. 

Thankful

I know it's a little late and most people aren't even thinking about Thanksgiving anymore because Christmas is quickly approaching but I wanted to write a little bit before it's way too late because there are so many things that I am thankful for this year.


I am especially thankful for my devoted husband, Jason. For all that he does for me, for all that he puts up with. He is such a rock in my life, he keeps me steady and at times is all that keeps me standing. He is so loving and affectionate and just plain funny. I don't know what I would do if I had to go one day without him being able to make me laugh. I am truly blessed by him.


I am thankful for my church family. It's been a very hard couple of years for me living in Tucson but I truly believe that God has us here for a reason. Or reasons I should say and one of those is definitely our church, Cornerstone. We have made so many friendships through Cornerstone and are still discovering more today. I love the spirit of our church, the excitement that surrounds every Sunday and the pure joy that our congregation has to be a part of what God is doing. I am especially thankful to our Pastors who have become very dear mentors and friends, almost parents to us lately. 


I am thankful for my job. Not everyone has the privilege to work in a ministry that serves close to 100 abused and neglected kids. Not everyone has the privilege to work with in-laws as amazing as mine are. I've taken my ups and downs in this ministry, tried something that didn't work out but I will never be the same because of the experience. I'm thankful that even though my experience was failure I've fit comfortably into in my new position. I'm so blessed to come to work every day with my family and to be a part of such an encouraging environment.


I am thankful for my family, near and far. For my parents who have always been supportive of my dreams and goals even though they might not have agreed. For my siblings who I can laugh and confide in. My sister especially for her encouragement. I am also so thankful for the family I have married in to. I am so blessed to be considered the favorite.


God has blessed Jason and I so much this past year. We have so much that so many others don't and it feels that God is just pouring out his favor on us and it's never-ending. We can even call ourselves home-owners now! I can't wait to see what God has in store for us this next year as I know His promises are in the works even now. 


So just a reminder to count your blessings, tell someone how thankful you are for them, and thank God too for the favor He has over you. 

The Craftiness in Me

I've found my new obsession!! I'm sure I'm way behind the times on this and that everyone is going to be like duh... you didn't know about that? Well I didn't and now I do and oh my goodness!!!

Pinterest.

It's amazing.

I kept hearing about it and yesterday I finally decided that I needed to figure out what it was. My crafting and cooking eyes have been opened to a whole new world and I can't wait to get started!

Please join me in my pursuit of being a better, craftier, cookier {not sure that's a word} housewife {well not really housewife because I have a full time job but you know what I mean}!

Here are some of the many things that I want to try!

Are you sensing my excitement?

I think I might need a sewing machine sometime soon. And lots of mod podge:)

Lay it Down

I've been working through a lot lately. Dealing with myself, picking up and moving forward. It's funny  how God works. His timing and plans, the people he brings into your life and the people he takes you away from. 


We've been living in Tucson for three years now. It's been a struggle for me through and through and I've never really been able to shake it or let it go. I've never really been able to pinpoint why either. I've just struggled. I've felt at times that I was drowning and I felt at times on top of the world. I've felt lonely and depressed and felt like there was hope on the horizon and friends were starting to enter our lives.
A few weeks ago I finally broke. I gave in and decided that I needed help, not something I'm used to asking for. 


Through some much needed counsel I feel released. I feel like God is working in me every moment of every day. I know now that he's never left my side. That he's always been there with me, orchestrating my every move and I fought it with all that I had. I allowed my mind to be open to lies and insecurity, to fear. Fear of what? Honestly everything. Why? I don't really know. You wonder why people are so insecure about things? I wonder why I was so afraid to open up and let people know who I really am. I'm fun and sweet and caring and loving. I have so much to offer and it doesn't matter what I look like or the things that I have. 


I know that I will always struggle with these things, who doesn't? But I realized this Sunday morning as I was at the altar that with God it will slowly become easier to deal with. I'll have to always be at the altar on my knees asking God for help. I'll have to lay down my fears and insecurity at his feet every morning but that's okay. That's what God is asking me to do. He's asking to take my burdens and he's reminding me every moment that he's with me.